


Assumptions

by iloveitblue



Series: Prompts [291]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Established, M/M, assumed cheating, they're wrong ofc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2015-09-02
Packaged: 2018-04-18 17:00:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4713629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iloveitblue/pseuds/iloveitblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where they all think Clint is a civilian and is cheating on Phil.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Assumptions

**Author's Note:**

> “Tony, stop staring.” Steve scolded. 

Tony turned to Steve absently for a second before going back to staring at the man at the bar. “Huh, Yeah. Sure. Martini, dry.” 

Steve shook his head and Natasha rolled her eyes. “What are you even staring at?” She asked him.

“Huh?” Tony turned to her. “Oh, that guy over there. The one at the bar. I know him from somewhere.” They all turned to the guy, making Bruce hum.

“Maybe he’s one of your one-night stands from way back in the day?” He suggested.

“No. I don’t remember my one-night stands.” 

Natasha scoffed at that. “That is horrible.” Tony waved her off.

“Isn’t that the Son of Coul’s mate?” Thor asked, tilting his head a little to the right.

“ _That’s_  why he looks so familiar. Agent introduced him to us! Well, me and Pepper. What was his name again? Clifford? Cloud?”

“Clint.” Steve provided. 

“Yes!” Tony pointed at Steve. 

“Huh. What’s he doing here? I thought Phil said they didn’t like places like these.” Bruce wondered out loud.

“They do not frequent, no.” Thor nodded along.

“Well, someone seems to be pretty busy.” Natasha jerked her chin in the general direction of Phil’s husband, who is currently necking a guy who is definitely not Phil.

“Do you think Phil knows?” Steve asked.

“Does it matter?” Thor followed up.

“We’re not sure about how marriages go in Asgard, but here on Earth, the only marriage that’s legal is that of two people. Anything beyond that without the consent of both is considered cheating.” Bruce explained.

“Exactly.” Tony pat Bruce’s shoulder and stood up. “Which is why we’re going to go talk to him and make sure he stays in line before any of this gets to Agent.”

“Wait, Tony-” Bruce called out. 

“There’s no wait. They’re on the move!” Tony called back. 

—

Tony waited until Clint and the guy he was with was close enough. In the dark alley, they never saw him coming. He watched as the two practically licked each other’s faces as they walked. It was disgusting. When they were finally in prime busting position, Tony moved under the only light in the alley. 

It was very dramatic. 

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Clint. Fancy meeting you here.” Tony did not miss the way Clint’s eyes widened a little before turning a confused gaze towards his companion.

“You know this guy?” Clint asked.

“Of course I know who he is. That’s Tony Stark. How do  _you_  know him?” The guy asked Clint.

“I don’t know him at all.” Clint said to the guy then turned to Tony. “Sorry dude- or Mr. Stark, or whatever, but we’re kind of in the middle of something here. This guy’s name isn’t Clint.” He explained to Tony, “It’s not, right?” Clint asked the guy.

“No.”

“Yeah. There you go. There’s no Clint here. So if you’ll excuse us-” Clint tried to push through to Tony, only to be blocked by Bruce and Steve. The two men turned back to find Thor and Natasha standing there. “I’m not dreaming right? The Avengers are actually boxing us in? You must be a really important guy.”

“Trust me, I’m not that important.” The guy insisted.

“Actually, SHIELD thinks otherwise.” said another voice before the guy spasmed uncontrollably then dropped to the ground like a sack of potatoes.

Clint rolled his head on his shoulders and fixed his jacket. He turned to the new voice and waved. “Hey Phil. Ran a little late, huh?”

Phil shrugged, “The alley got too crowded too quickly.” Seemingly out of nowhere, two SHIELD agents came in to cuff the guy and take him away. “Gentlemen, Natasha. What are you doing here?”

Varying degrees of confusion and shock answered Phil’s question. “No, Phil. What are _you_  doing here?” Tony asked back.

“I believe I asked first.” 

“We were having a drink. Then we saw Clint leave with someone who isn’t you so we decided to follow him.” Steve explained.

“Okay. Your turn.” Natasha demanded.

“I already told you this afternoon. I had a mission.” 

“Well then, what is your spouse doing with another man?” Thor asked.

“What do you think?”

“Well, we thought that he was cheating on you, hence the creepy decision to follow him, but now I’m thinking he wasn’t really cheating on you.” Bruce frowned, confused.

“I never did tell you what Clint did for a living, did I?” Phil asked. 

“I’m a SHIELD agent.” Clint provided. “Phil’s been my handler since he recruited me.”

“No you’re not. I would’ve seen you otherwise.” Natasha countered.

“You would, if you knew about my existence.” Clint shrugged.

“Clint is a part of a special division in SHIELD specializing in deep cover operations. Nobody but Director Fury and their handlers know about them.” Phil explained.

“So let me get this straight. You-” Steve pointed at Phil. “-are married to him-” He pointed at Clint. “-and you’re both working together on a mission tonight to apprehend that guy-” Steve pointed to the end of the alley. “-with your husband as the bait.”

“Pretty much.”

“I guess you could say it like that.”

“Huh.” Tony muttered. “A secret division within a secret government agency. Why am I not surprised?” Tony shook his head softly. 

“Since we are all gathered here, let us resume the night’s festivities!” Thor announced.

**Author's Note:**

> [Here on tumblr](http://promptmephlint.tumblr.com/post/128196076671/tomorrow-is-thursday-im-so-happy-happy)


End file.
